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Good Enough.

by Me As A Pilot

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1.
I'm still laughing at the fact that I've been a fool Yeah, I'll take that back I've been thinking that I'm a bit confused And I know you know it's true But if you say so, I will stay But if you wait too long, I will go away You've been holding me like strings that hold marionettes You could cut me loose, and I'll crumble at your feet But you haven't yet I feel like I've been waiting a long time to hold you until I die
2.
I'll be alright by the morning, just put me under I'll be alright, I swear, if you leave me alone If there's something I said that made you feel sad, or whatever Well, I'm sorry, but I just sometimes lose control I'll be alright by this evening, just let me lie here I'll be alright by this evening, just get me the drugs There is pain that is true, and I always knew this about you One eye's looking away, and one eye is looking at me "So call out to something that you can believe" Says the man in the corner who's staring at me He reflects what I want based off of the things that I need I'm crying for my baby, "Won't you please stay? We can talk for a while, though there ain't much to say." As she casually laughs and slowly walks away I'll be alright by this weekend, they say I'm not dying I'll be alright by this weekend if the doctors are right Well, that's what they said But I still feel dead without you Yeah, well, I'll be just fine but I've got no clue what to do
3.
Wait 03:01
Will you test the water for me? Because I can't stand the heat My skin burns more easy than yours Your skin is strong as steel If we depend on each other And love like before Then you won't leave And I will just be And we can finally breathe But I couldn't wait for something to wait for I was fed up, so what would I stay for? We will stay forever this way We can finally see Why we couldn't wait for something to stay for If you've been fed up, then what would you wait for?
4.
Stay Awake 03:29
Times, they change When times get strange, I don't see it as a problem Things may lead to better days But a haze is making me nervous I've got a lot of things, but what tomorrow brings Adds on to the painfully obvious I'll stay awake for you Like I'm "supposed" to do I can stay up and read, Go and find something else to eat, Or walk around the shady streets I'll stay awake for you I'll stay up You're breaking my balls Why do you get involved with everything that I'm doing? Sometimes people find their peace, with or without you to ruin it
5.
Lovehoney 05:01
I wouldn't say that I can make you money But we can make love, honey It makes sense to me I wouldn't stay with just one person But no other person has ever loved me that way At least when we were that age So if I let you down, or you feel left out Honey, let me know and I'll change You once said "we're human beings, we get these feelings and they don't go away." Does that make me a bad person? Well, what's the worst thing that I could possibly say? "Honey, I don't feel that way?" So if I let you down, or you feel left out Honey, let me know and I'll change
6.
Adeline 03:25
Adeline, oh Adeline, I'm coming back for you You always show such discontent in everything I do I've been saving all my change, and I quit drinking too Adeline, oh Adeline, I'm coming back for you It was all coming up daisies by the time you came around We were happier than ever, right before my luck ran out I was getting drunk again and letting go of the truth Adeline, oh Adeline Honey, I don't blame you I was always stepping out, though I'm through with it now There's a shadow on the wall that has been there since you ran out I'm different man, I swear Well, at least for an hour or two Adeline, oh Adeline, I'm coming back for you Adeline, oh Adeline, please come back to me I always cared about you, and you know that my love runs deep But I was never quite the man that you wanted me to be Adeline, oh Adeline, please come back to me
7.
Surfer 03:48
I won't try to plant a seed Or understand what you've done to me It's not my place I don't run around the town To find a way to put you down It's not my place You've been holding out again, I know With your dreams of moving out to the coast As if your inner-surfer would ride a wave to me Instead of laying by the beach smoking weed It's a fantasy I won't tell you how to live The criticism that I give Is fine by me I won't try to hold you back As if your life is still on track It's fine by me You've been heading out again, I know With your dreams of moving out to the coast As if your inner-surfer would ride away from me Instead of laying by the beach smoking weed It's a fantasy But it's what you do to me
8.
Let Me Down 03:20
Something's gotta give away I've grown tired of staying late For a while I've notice, while you're out smoking You're needing a better love, and you know that I'm not one If you think it's right, you can end it tonight I'm tired of being broke But baby, I'm not broken If you've got something else to say, maybe you should say it You know I hate playing around Maybe you should just let me down Let me down I found an easy way to forget a couple of days I call it "Self Loathing and Getting Boring" Could I say anything tonight to set this whole thing right? I need instant gratification in this situation
9.
10.
Roll 03:13
A restless heart skips a beat You never understand the fear you bring Calm me down, walk with me Up the hill and underneath the willow tree Will you let me roll as you let go of me? Business men And begging hands ignored by society's plans to wipe them out Survival of the fittest, or just privileged scum? You let them roll (I don't know. Everything I know is something old) As you let go of the idea (I let go of everything that I used to know) That we all have needs And we're all diseased But what people see is the endless fear That we've gotten near Where do we go from here?
11.
Restless dark I don't think I've seen you more alarmed Ever since, I've wondered where we are and where we're not 14th street Apartments with a drug store in between I bought a back of cigarettes and pressed one between my teeth As I was sitting there I wondered If there was something to recover Because I've made mistakes and blunders But I try to be a better lover I do Junked out cars A maple tree with names carved in the bark From people who once had a brand new start But now it's gone She looks at me But I am looking somewhere in between The grass along the picket fence and the drinks at the bar So say what you want and leave me, baby I'm just not try to please you, honey Don't stay if you want to save an old, old memory Just stay if it's right
12.
To My Grave 04:43
As I recall The second I saw your face I knew in that time and place where this would go Will you take my name? Lead me to my grave? I guess in other words, never let me go I don't remember a time without your love It's like it was always there, even though we're young Endlessly, this love will stay with us, always Even as ghosts, I'd still need you the most as we wander the earth as memories There isn't a thing about you I would change And honey, it's so strange But I need you to know I don't remember a time without your love It's like it was always there, even before it was Endlessly, this love will stay with us, always

credits

released July 14, 2015

all songs written and performed by Nick Costa except for :
Eric Carranza - guitar on "if you say so"
Leah Ottman - violin on "if you say so" and "to my grave"
Solvay Peterson - cello on "to my grave"
"up with mittens, down with gloves" written by Red Fox Grey Fox

recorded by nick costa in a basement, on a phone, on a tape machine, sometimes with a laptop microphone, sometimes with nice microphones

all between the years of 2012 and 2015.

Cover photo by Sam Sanford
Back Cover photo by Katie Essick

© me as a pilot / 2015 / all rights reserved

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Me As A Pilot Minneapolis, Minnesota

Me As A Pilot is the solo project for Nick Costa. Nick is also the singer/guitarist in the band The Person and The People (thepersonandthepeople.bandcamp.com).

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